Sunday, September 25, 2011

Liberating


These past 3 weeks have been some of the best of my life--without sounding too drastic and naive.

I mean, really; never in my life have I felt so liberated, free, and independent.
Finding myself again without any predispositions from anyone of who I am, who I was, or who I am to be.
Finding what I want for my life.
Finding what I need for my life.
Making things happen.
Feeling like you're living and jumping into what you were made for.
I was made for this.
Going along with the current without paddling or hesitating.
I don't owe anyone an explanation or defensiveness.
This is my life.
Not yours.
Not his.
Not hers.
I have something to make of this all--and you better believe I have already started.

I don't know exactly what lies ahead of me, but I have this serene peace about it all.
I'm okay not knowing.
I'm okay taking leaps.
I'm okay.

Finally, I'm okay.

Here's to living the destined life..

Monday, September 19, 2011

Created To Be Extraordinary

This weekend I had the utmost pleasure of visiting Body of Christ Church in Ames, Iowa.

I don't think I will ever forget this experience. The morning had a bit of a chill in the air, and the fog hung in a low hazy way. The streets were pretty bare with a few people here and there wandering to their destinations that Sunday morning. Billy had told me that it was small, but other than that I didn't really know what else to expect. I walked in the doors and could hear the muffled voices of the choir just outside the building. As the doors opened and we entered, this feeling overwhelmed me--authenticity. I looked around and saw roughly 75 people or so all of different races, colors, ages, etc. The choir was on stage--most of them African American. Now, let me interrupt things for a second here and explain something. I was born in Forest Lake, Minnesota. One of the smallest of small towns in Minnesota and the definition of white suburbia. You could say I grew up in a sheltered way concerning diversity--I wasn't really exposed to it. So there I stood; a small town, white suburbia girl (and I mean WHITE), in a church with multiple different races, people dancing, people singing, people shouting, and just genuinely praising God. At first I was a little taken back. You could say it was kind of out of my comfort zone just in the sense that I had never been to a church like that--but within the matter of minutes, it's like my soul melted into the rest of the other hearts of the congregation. Immediately I felt like I was already a part of the church, like I was a part of the Body inside the congregation of that church.

I didn't know the songs at all. I'm used to Hillsong United, David Crowder, Desperation Band, etc. But even though I didn't know the tune, even though I didn't know the words, even though I didn't know a thing about the songs, jumping right into praising God came easy for me there. I felt welcomed, I felt accepted, and I felt like nothing was holding me back.

After worship, the pastor stood up and treached (taught + preached). Pastor Toran Smith, I have been told, works at a UPS store, and felt God laying it on his heart to start this church. When you hear and see him speak, the reason why God had that calling on his life is very apparent. He spoke with such just, authenticity, truth, and a life-giving-focused way. He spoke out of love, out of teaching, out of preaching, and out of being a vessel of Christ. He was stern, yet humble in his strength.

The topic of the message was Extraordinary. The second I picked up the pamphlet that we were to follow along in, and I read that single word "extraordinary" across the top, I knew it wasn't just by chance that I was there for that sermon.

He went into reading Daniel. Talking about how Daniel had an extraordinary spirit and extraordinary wisdom. Inside that, he started speaking about how there are barriers that keep us from being extraordinary. Barriers are something that I have had to deal with (which I'm sure a lot of you can relate to) on a pretty regular basis--especially in the past few years. A barrier can be anything from hate built up in your heart, to rules, to people speaking un-righteous things over our lives. Basically, a barrier is anything that keeps us out and away from living to our extraordinary potential.

I have allowed barriers to surround me. Heck, I've even probably built some of them myself. Within that, I've surrounded myself with them, keeping me back from reaching that extraordinary destiny that Christ fashioned my heart for. Destroying those barriers completely is something I have already immediately started praying and interceding for. I was so encouraged to realize that God can use me for His purpose, for His glory, for His Kingdom, all in extraordinary ways than my mind can even imagine. Over my dead body am I going to let barriers keep me away from that. Over my dead body will I just settle for some mediocre, boring, day-to-day life.

This message just really pierced my heart and I think it was a huge push that my heart needed to hear. I'm really in a transitioning point in my life right now, not knowing exactly what lies ahead of me, but I have such a peace about it. Basically I'm in the river, allowing God to take the current wherever He wants and whatever speed He wants, and I'm just floating along--not paddling, just floating. I'm so thankful for how Christ works--all in His perfect timing and perfect ways.

My encouragement to you is to read through Daniel, let this soak in, think about what your barriers are, and what is having you settle for being ordinary rather than extraordinary.

Here's to living the destined life..

Thursday, September 1, 2011

What These Hands Were Made For

"We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith;  if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach;  if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully. "
~Romans 12:6-8




My Aunt Pat blessed me immensely with a $75 giftcard for a wonderful art supply store called "Dick Blick's" (don't for get the "B"). I went there for the first time on Tuesday and immediately was overwhelmed with excitement going from isle to isle not knowing where to start. An employee kindly helped me pick out what to get. I told her as far as painting went, I had only used watercolors and that I would like to try something new. She ever so sweetly pointed me in the right direction to the perfect acrylic paints, paint brushes, and canvas.

Tonight I finally had the time to sit down with all of my new goodies and put them to good use. I have always been the artistic one--painting, sketching, designing, creating, writing, dancing, etc. I was so excited to try a new medium of art and stretch my artistic abilities!!

Prophetic art is specifically something that has been on my heart for a long time. I love to have something on my heart, hear some scripture, listen to a song lyric, or have God speak to my heart and then put it into a creation. There is something so liberating, freeing, and healing for me in that.

So tonight, I turned my phone on silent, put my iTunes worship playlist on shuffle, started praying, and let my hands do the work. At first, I kind of felt intimidated. I had no idea of how to use acrylics, how to paint with them, what to paint, etc--but in my intimidation, I felt God asking me to sit in silence. It was in that intimate moment, where I closed out the fear and unknown of a new thing for me, that I just let myself start speaking in a language that probably wouldn't make sense to anyone else. Speaking in tongues is something that I have started making myself practice--having that intimate language and communication with Christ is something I have learned to hunger for and love dearly. In that time, I felt God just saying "Let Me work through you. Let Me work through you. Let ME work through YOU." So, I picked up that first bottle of paint, squirted it onto the pallet, picked up my brush, and set it to the canvas. I didn't have it all planned out of what I was going to paint, and surprisingly I was more than okay with that. I just started painting while singing and praying--and these 2 little creations are what I came up with. They're just little canvas' for practice--but the resources that they became to my night made me ever so thankful.

The first one is just kind of my portrayal of a reminder to myself of what Christ sees me as--not what my family sees me as, friends, people at church, people that dislike me--just what Christ sees me as. That I was formed in His image and He fashioned my heart to be one with Him.
The second one of the feather is just kind of a light, hopeful feeling--a reminder that His path is narrow but His burden light. PRAISE GOD FOR THAT!!

My hope and prayer in my art is that it not only is a healing intimate thing for myself, but that it would speak on measures and levels to others that my own mind cannot even fathom. That they could see my art and something would stir in their hearts. That they would search their heart for what it speaks to them--and maybe what God is trying to speak to them through it.

All in all, I highly highly suggest stretching yourself to doing something like this.
I know I'll be doing it way more often and cannot wait until the next time I get to have a time like I did tonight.



Here's to living the destined life..